Today is a day I have dreaded, as it is the one year mark since I found out I was pregnant with Wyatt. I remember everything as if it happened yesterday.
I was laying on the table in the IVF transfer room and the nurse said, "You will have your blood test on 12/16 to determine if IVF worked." Brian and I looked at each other and then I said, "That is my brother's birthday and he is in Iraq, IVF will work and I will be pregnant."
On 12/16, I drove to the doctors. On the way there, I remember hearing the song, "Tonight's gonna be a good night", to this day I still cringe when I hear it. I had my blood drawn and I awaited the call.
My cell phone rang at 10:38a, on December 16, 2009. The nurse on the other end said, "I can't believe it, but you are definitely pregnant. It worked." I was at work. I got up and walked into the empty education room, I got my numbers from the nurse and my next steps, and called Brian. He was shocked. I think he was actually stunned. I then called my mom and sister. Then I sent a MySpace message to my brother in Iraq. It said, "Happy birthday. I am finally pregnant, we found out today, on your birthday!"
What a day that was. Funny what a year can do. You can have so much, have it all taken away, and then be given the chance all over again. It's even funnier how much one person can be taught about life in a matter of one year.
It is snowing today, our first real snowfall of the season. I would have normally just awed over the snow because it was pretty and moved on. But today is different. Today is the one year mark since we found out we were pregnant with Wyatt, and it is now snowing out. I can only think that this is a sign from my son.
As I sent my brother a text message today, wishing him a happy birthday, I also added that Wyatt must really love his Uncle because he made it snow on his birthday!
I still wish things were different. I wish my son was here with me about to be four months old, but that is not the case. Instead, he is in Heaven looking down on his family and ensuring we receive our signs when the timing is just right.
December 16, one year ago, we were excited to find out we were pregnant with our first child. Today, I receive a sign from him and pray that God shows him all the love he deserves, while I show it from the other side of Heaven!
1 comment:
It's hard to believe we are already at another set of milestones, isn't it? The ones that we lived with the beginning of our pregnancies. Mikayla's conception date, Jan 4, is coming up soon too. I'm amazed at how significant these dates and memories of them can be. Thinking of you today
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