Thursday, August 9, 2012


Sadly it has been a while since I posted anything on this blog.  I get upset at myself every day for not posting on here more, but the truth of the matter is, I just can't.  I have been having a hard time dealing with the fact that Wyatt's second "birthday" just passed. Since his party, I have been in a dark spot.  Luckily, Nolan's first birthday was just around the corner and I devoted my time to that.  But since Nolan's party, the pain has come crushing back, even more so.  Nolan's birthday was great, but it made me realize just all I have missed out on with Wyatt.  Yes, I am lucky to have a wonderful gift here with me but I still do and will always miss my little Wyatt.

Like I said, I have been in a dark spot, and today it hit hard when I found out that another little heart warrior had returned to the heavens.  I don't know this little girl personally nor had I ever had the privilege to meet her in person.  But she touched my heart with her heart story and she reminded me of how things could have been if Wyatt was still with us.  Heart surgeries, hospitals, her strength, and her fight.

I still can't believe this little girl is now an angel.  Although losing a son, I just can't imagine the pain and heartache this family is dealing with at this time.  I have found myself in tears multiple times today.  I know the pain a parent feels when they lose a child and to know that another family is going through that pain right now, it just isn't right.  No parent, NO PARENT, should ever experience the loss of a child.  I don't know what pain could ever be worse.

I sit here pondering if Wyatt would have pulled through the surgery would something like this have happened to him.  I will never know.  We never know.  We are given choices and we have to make the best choice at the time that we are presented with it.  We can live life asking the what if's, but would it change anything?  We are given life but we don't know for how long.  Life is something to be treasured for whatever the short period that we have it for.  Some life is longer than other, but in the end it is not the length that matters.  Some of the greatest warriors I have known are those who have lived very VERY short lives.