Reality

I sit and look at your pictures as I feed your brother and it makes my heart hurt ache.  I see you in him with each of his facial expressions.  I think about what you would have been like at this age.  I wonder what you would have looked like now.  I often find myself imagining what it would be like to have a one year old and your brother at the same time. 

I know that you are where you are safe and free from pain.  I know that you can't come back to us.  But there are so many times over the past few weeks where I find myself believing that you are still just gone for a little bit, like you will return to us soon.  Then reality sets back in and I realize I am wrong. 

Oh Wyatt, why did it have to be like this.  I miss you so much.  I find myself standing in front of your urn several times a weeks with your brother.  When he laughs in his sleep I wonder if he is dreaming of you.  When he looks past me and seems amused I wonder if you sees you. 

I wish that you and your brother would have grown up together.  I wish that you could have played together and acted like brothers do.  Instead, I ask that you watch over your brother and that you show your brother (when the time is right) that you are there.  One day your brother will know and understand everything about you.