Day 258 - June 4, 2011One year balloon release.
How can it be? It has been one year already since the day you slipped away from us. We gathered together, read a poem, and sent your balloons to you in Heaven. Words cannot express how much we miss you and wish you were here with us.
We love you Wyatt James!
Day 257 - June 3, 2011Our Little Monkey banner.
Mommy saw the cutest banner ever on the Internet and wanted to make something special just for you. It took several hours, but the end product was well worth it. The banner says, "Our Little Monkey".
Forever our little monkey you will be.
Day 256 - June 2, 2011The newest little monkey for you.
Yes, with your party right around the corner, Mommy had to purchase you a new little monkey. She wanted to ensure it was front and center for the party. It was perfect, green to match the theme color!
We hope that you love your newest little monkey.
Day 255 - June 1, 2011Your very own party cup.
Mommy wanted to do something special for you, something that everyone at the party would get to be involved in, but still something for you. She decided to make your party cup and have it hold scrapbook papers that everyone at the party could write you a message on. The papers would then be added to your scrapbook after the party.
The messages you received are wonderful Wyatt! Everyone misses you and loves you very much.
Day 254 - May 31, 2011Kiddie favors.
What's a party without party favors, right? Well, your mama put her creativity to work and made these cute little party cups. Of course, Mommy made one for you too. That will be shown in the next photo!
Day 253 - May 30, 2011Wyatt Jars.
Mommy made these cute little jars to hold the utenzils at your party. Mommy is so proud of these jars and is very happy that your name will be displayed for all to remember!
Day 252 - May 29, 2011Mama got pulled over.
You were there looking out of Mommy today. Mommy got pulled over in the mini van car rental with CT tags for doing 72 in a 55. Of course, Mommy used her loud mouth and agrued with the cop because she knew she wasn't going 72. The cop only gave Mommy a warning and let her go.
Thank you for looking out for us Monkey!! Love you!
Day 251 - May 28, 2011Angel Wings.
A beautiful reminder that Mommy found out on FB.
Day 250 - May 27, 2011Another friendly reminder.
Mommy came across another reminder today on FB. It quickly made her think of you.
We miss you and love you very much son!
Day 249 - May 26, 2011Party City time!!!
Today Mommy went shopping to purchase the remaining supplies needed for your one year birthday celebration. Mommy decided the best place would be Party City. It was so much fun. Mommy had a blast shopping for your party and ensuring that everything was purchased to make your party a huge success.
Day 248 - May 25, 2011A song that melted Mommy's heart.
Watching the season finale of American Idol tonight was tough, because that it what Mommy did the night she was rushed to University of Penn with you. It was 5/26/10 and it was Simon's last show. Tonight's finale had one of the contestants singing with Tim McGraw. Together they sang the song "Live Like You Are Dying." This songs has meaning to Mommy, for it is a song that was played after Mommy's friend Jen died. Jen is the same friend Mommy dreamt about during your entire pregnancy, up until the last night in University of Penn.
Day 247 - May 24, 2011Another reminder from FB.
Mommy saw this on FB and of course, it reminded her of you. Can't wait until the butterflies are back out, which will be very soon, so Mommy can be reminded of you every time she sees one!
Day 246 - May 23, 2011A reminder from a friend.
Mommy received this photo of a book that was being read to a child this evening. The book was about monkeys and it reminded Mommy's FB friend of you, so she sent Mommy a picture of it.
It is so wonderful to have so many others remember you. Love you much!
Day 245 - May 22, 2011A beautiful reminder.
Mommy found this on the Internet, on a blog of another family who lost their little Wyatt. It reminded me of you. Oh, Wyatt, how we miss you so very very much.
Day 244 - May 21, 2011Planting the gardens.
And just like that, the pain from the stones is gone. Yay! Now it is time to plant the gardens and make the yard look pretty. Just as it was last year, bending down to plant the flowers isn't something a pregnant woman should be doing. Talk about pain in the sides.
Day 243 - May 20, 2011OUCH!!! Stones!
Yes, that's right. Mommy has kidney stones yet again. This is something that Mommy gets every now and then, but being pregnant with brother makes it worse.
Just as the pain gets bad, Mommy thinks of the pain you must have been in with your little heart, and I push through. Mommy still doesn't know how you fought for so long, but she is so proud of you.
Day 242 - May 19, 2011A visit with the pediatrician.
Mommy had a visit with the pediatrician today for brother. This was something that Mommy never did with you. It was always on Mommy's list to do, but we never made it that far. At the visit today, we talked so much about you. All of the girls in the office wanted to hear about you, it was wonderful.
Love you Monkey!!!
Day 241 - May 18, 2011A broken little heart.
After Nolan's ultrasound today, the one where he decided not to show Mommy and Daddy his little face (just like you used to do), Mommy came home and pulled out your paperwork. Mommy has a doctor's appointment tomorrow and wants to be sure she understands everything that was wrong with your little heart.
Day 240 - May 17, 2011A photo with brother.
Daddy decided to take a few photos of Mommy today with brother Nolan. Of course we want to include you in the photo also, so you could be with brother.
We wish you could really be in the photos, but we understand that you had to return home. We miss you and love you very very much.
Day 239 - May 16, 2011A monkey of a reminder.
Yes, whenever Mommy sees a monkey she thinks of you. This all started because of Cheeky, the monkey Daddy bought for you. Today was no different. This monkey came Mommy's way and you were thought of.
Love you my son!
Day 238 - May 15, 2011The words of the church.
Today your cousin, Isabella, received her holy communion. She looked beautiful! During the mass at the church, the priest's words really touched Mommy and made her realize that life isn't always fair, but it is the way it happens. This is something that Mommy has known, but the way the priest stated it today made so much sense.
We miss you so very very much Wyatt!!!
Day 237 - May 14, 2011Angel tears.
It's raining today and the forecast is saying it is supposed to rain for almost a week. Though Mommy doesn't like the rain, it does remind her of you. Everything we do for you from walks and parties to your service we had for you, it always rains. Mommy believes it is because you are sending down your angel tears.
Love you always!
Day 236 - May 13, 2011Somewhere up above.
The weather on the weekends has been rainy and not to great. But every now and again we get one good day. Of course Mommy still thinks of you regardless of the weather. Rain to Mommy means angel tears and when it is nice, it just means Mommy can see clear into Heaven.
Day 235 - May 12, 2011So many wonderful projects.
Since your passing my little one, Mommy has found a wealth of support on the Internet. She has found so many wonderful friends and organizations. This is just another of the many sites that Mommy has found that support Infant Loss.
Day 234 - May 11, 2011Mommy's pregnant belly.
Mommy's belly just continues to grow larger and larger. She knows that your brother Nolan is starting to take up more and more room, but for whatever reason, she sometimes feels that it is you.
Missing you much baby boy!
Day 233 - May 10, 2011Monkeys are everywhere.
Mommy is having so much fun planning for your one year angelversary. Of course, it would be perfect if you were here, but Mommy understands that can't be. Mommy and Daddy have monkeys everywhere right now, but that is okay because they are reminders of you!!!
Day 232 - May 9, 2011Birthday preparations.
Mommy is gearing up for your one year angelversary. Daddy and Mommy decided it would be wonderful to host a party for you and do a balloon release with all of your family. Of course, since you will always be our little monkey, the theme is monkeys. The first project Mommy worked on for you was your banner. Mommy was inspired by this photo.
Day 231 - May 8, 2011Mother's Day.
Today was Mother's Day, baby. Last year, you were here in Mommy's belly to celebrate it with her. This year, sadly, you were up above. Mommy thought of you a lot today, but Mommy realizes that you gave us the best gift ever. We were able to spend time with you, feel you move, and hold you before we had to let go.
Mommy missed you very much on Mother's Day, but Nolan let me know that you were close by.
Day 230 - May 7, 2011 Wyatt Hall.
Mommy received this picture from a FB friend. Of course, an instant reminder of you my little boy. So very wonderful.
Love you!
Day 229 - May 6, 2011Mother's Day Swap.
Mommy received her Mother's Day Swap gift today, and it was beautiful. The gift was so special and every bit of it was about you. Mommy may never take this special gift down, it is so beautiful.
Missing you very much baby boy.
Day 228 - May 5, 2011Wyatt's Whisper Giveaway.
Mommy did the first ever Wyatt's Whisper Giveaway a few weeks ago. It was done because our blog surpassed 10,000 page views. Mommy was so excited and had so much fun putting together the giveway bag.
Day 227 - May 4, 2011The surgery from eleven months ago.
Today marked eleven months since the last time your little heart beat and the last time you were alive with Mommy and Daddy. June 4th was the day of your surgery. The one that Mommy thinks back to every day, the one that we hoped would save your little life. Sadly, that was not the case. Mommy sometimes regrets the decision to do the surgery, but regrets are what happen when the worst happens regardless of the decision.
We miss you so very much precious child. We love you with everything we have ever had!
Day 226 - May 3, 2011A tough day.
Today was a tough day, one where Mommy felt like she needed to live in two worlds. One with Daddy and Nolan and the other there with you. Seems like those days are more and more. Mommy misses you so much and the time is growing more longer since we have been together.
One day, Wyatt, one day we will be together again.
Day 225 - May 2, 2011A sad but beautiful picture.
This was received from a BLM today. It makes Mommy sad but it is a beautiful picture.
Day 224 - May 1, 2011International Babylost Mother's Day.
Today is International Babylost Mother's Day. Mommy never knew about this day before, but then again, Mommy didn't know much about this world before. Mommy has learned so much over the past 11 months and all of it is because of you. Mommy misses you so much that words can't even describe. But she knows that you are in a better place and you will be there when she arrives.
Day 223 - April 30, 2011Brother Nolan's Registry.
Today Mommy and Mommom went to Target to complete brother Nolan's registry. This is something that Mommy never got to do with you. While we were there, Mommy found a perfect outfit that said, "Little Brother". Mommom purchased it for Nolan and Mommy can't wait to put him in it.
Day 222 - April 29, 2011So many angels.
A BLM made this for other BLM's. It is a special rememberance of our angels. There are a lot of little angels listed on this photo, so many it makes Mommy sad.
I miss you little one.
Day 221 - Thursday, April 28, 2011More reminders.
Mommy received more flowers today from other BLM's. They are so beautiful and colorful. Each one was another reminder of my precious angel up above.
Mommy loves you very much Wyatt!
Day 220 - Wednesday, April 27, 2011Beauty of a Mother.
Mommy received this photo today from a BLM on FB. It is so beautiful and it quickly reminded Mommy of you. You, my son, made me a Mommy!!!! For that, I will be forever grateful to you!
Day 219 - Tuesday, April 26, 2011Your name in blocks.
Mommy received the cutest photo today from another BLM on FB. The photo was of your name in blocks. Just to see your name brings peace to Mommy's heart. Since you can't be here with us, it is always so wonderful to have photos of your name sent to us. Mommy loves this one, because it has a dragonfly under your name too!
Day 218 - Monday, April 25, 2011We sold another.
Oh Wyatt, the baby hats just keep selling. This time, the hat is going to Canada. That's right son, we sold our first one outside of the United States. Mommy loves the fact that your name is attached to all of them. Wyatt's Wishes!!!
Your memory will always live on, forever and ever.
Day 217 - Sunday, April 24, 2011Easter baking.
Today, Mommy decided to do a little baking to remember you and include Nolan. She decided to make rainbow colored cupcakes. Nolan is Mommy's rainbow baby and you, my son, are somewhere over that beautiful rainbow.
We love you baby boy, may all the colors of the rainbow shine over you!
Day 216 - Saturday, April 23, 2011An Easter present for you!
Nana and Grandpa came to visit Mommy and Daddy today to deliver your Easter present. Oh Wyatt, your present is beautiful. Nana and Grandpa remembered that we planted several hydrenias in honor of you after your funeral. They brought another hydrenia and it was in full bloom, it's beautiful.
Mommy and Daddy are going to plant it in your garden that we are going to make for you this spring. We can't wait!
Day 215 - Friday, April 22, 2011Happy Early Easter.
Mommy made this photo today so that she would have comfort knowing that you were near. Mommy loves this photo, it makes her feel that you are close and watching over.
Love you baby!
Day 214 - Thursday, April 21, 2011Butterfly...
Soon it will be warm enough for the butterflies to return. Mommy can't wait because each one reminds her of you. This little blue butterfly found on the Internet will have to do today. But soon, there will be tons of photos that Mommy takes will little butterflies.
We miss you Wyatt. Love you always, Mommy and Daddy
Day 213 - Wednesday, April 20, 2011Two turtle doves....
The doves came back today. Well, we aren't sure if they are the same ones or not, but we have two more and they are back. We noticed one a few days ago, but today they were both there. The birds remind Mommy of you because we saw them on the pool fence before your surgery on 6/4 and they were here after we lost you.
To have two turtle doves return again this year, means so much to Mommy and Daddy.
Day 212 - Tuesday, April 19, 2011We were featured!!!
Wyatt!!! The Wyatt's Wishes ETSY shop was featured by Jessica today. It was so wonderful to see that our shop was highlighted for others to see and visit. To date, we have sold seven hats and one blanket. It is so wonderful, Wyatt. All of the funds are being put towards Wyatt's Wishes and will be used to donate to NILMDTS or CHD research. Some of the funds will be used to fund the Angel Care Packages.
It is so wonderful that we have been able to start something that will help so many others!
Day 211 - Monday, April 18, 2011Angel Hearts.
A friend posted this on FB today and when Mommy saw this she quickly thought of you. The saying is perfect, absolutely perfect.
It says: Your life was a blessing, your memory a treasure, you will always be with us, in our hearts forever!
We love you baby boy!
Day 210 - Sunday, April 17, 2011A giveaway!!!
Today Mommy logged into our blog, Wyatt's Whisper, and to her surprise we had reached over 10,000 views. 10,000 views Wyatt, can you believe it? Mommy never thought that Wyatt's Whisper would be viewed so many times. It means the world to Mommy to know that so many people have viewed our page, know your story, and enjoy reading the posts.
Mommy decided to do a giveaway which will include a gift bag filled with Springtime remindes for another BLM. Mommy can't wait to post pictures of the giveaway bag.
Day 209 - Saturday, April 16, 2011A friend's birthday.
Since about the middle of Mommy's pregnancy with you, Mommy had dreams about a friend who had passed away. The dreams were very real and it was like she was trying to tell Mommy something. The last dream that Mommy had about this friend while pregnant with you was one Mommy will never forget. Mommy will need to blog about that dream in another post when the time is right. But today was Mommy's friends birthday. Her name is Jennifer. She would have been 31 years old.
If you are with Jennifer, please tell her Mommy says hello.
Day 208 - Friday, April 15, 2011Donation of Angel Pennies.
Today, Mommy received a wonderful donation from Laken's Bears of Angel Pennies to place in the Angel Care Packages. The Angel Pennies are perfect and will add so much to each box. Many thanks to Melissa from Laken's Bears!!!
Day 207 - Thursday, April 14, 2011A little monkey from you.
Mommy ordered a gift for you to give to Nolan when he arrives home from the hospital. Of course, the gift is a monkey!!! We thought it would be wonderful for Nolan to receive a special gift from you, since you are his big brother and the reason why Nolan is here.
So do you think it will be perfect???
Day 206 - Wednesday, April 13, 2011Just a little saying that reminded me of you.
Mommy found this tonight on ETSY and it instantly reminded her of you.
You are forever in Mommy and Daddy's heart!
Day 205 - Tuesday, April 12, 2011Swap assignment.
Oh Wyatt, Mommy is so excited. Participating in these holiday swaps with other BLMs is something that Mommy would have never known about if we hadn't lost you. It sure is amazing how life can literally change in a blink of an eye.
Today, Mommy received her assignment. We have to make a flower bouquet for a mommy to a little angel named Eva. When you see Eva, can you please let her know that your Mommy is making her mommy a wonderful Mother's Day gift?!!!
Day 204 - Monday, April 11, 2011Imagining you.
Mommy finds herself wondering how big you have gotten, if you grow in Heaven, and if you play up there. Mommy stumbled across this picture on the Internet and it made her think of you. Mommy's favorite flower is a daisy, so if you can play in the flowers of Heaven, Mommy would hope you select the daisies.
Love you baby boy.
Day 203 - Sunday, April 10, 2011The Pooh mural.
Mommy had this awesome idea to have the closet doors in the nursery painted with a mural of Pooh Bear for brother Nolan. What do you think? Think he will like it? Mommy thought of you while selecting the photo, and don't you worry, a blue butterfly will be painted in the mural so your reminder will always be there for brother.
Day 202 - Saturday, April 9, 2011A Mother's Day Swap.
Mommy signed up for a Mother's Day Swap today. Since this would have been the first "real" Mother's Day with you, Mommy wanted to participate in something that would remind her of you and help another Mommy. So, Mommy will be making a beautiful flower arrangement of sorts and sending it to another special Mommy of an angel.
It's going to be a special Mother's Day and Mommy knows that you will be there with her!
Day 201 - Friday, April 8, 2011Holding onto the future with a glimpse into the past.
This week was tough. It was your 10 month angelversary and on the same day, yes Wednesday, Mommy and Daddy had a scare with Nolan. There was bleeding and cramping. It wasn't good. After calling the doctor we found ourselves in the room watching a heart monitor. It was very very scary and we relived the same feelings we had only 10 months before.
After the day was over and looking back on it now, Mommy realizes we were holding onto the future with a glimpse into the pain and heartache of the past.
Day 200 - Thursday, April 7, 2011The perfect onesie!
Mommy found the perfect onesie for brother Nolan today. It says, "My brother is an Angel in Heaven." Mommy is going to ask for this for the shower, but if we don't receive it, Mommy is going to order it for brother Nolan.
What do you think? Mommy thinks that brother Nolan would be honored to wear a onesie that mentions his big brother!
Day 199 - Wednesday, April 6, 2011Ten months today!
Wow, how can it be? Today is 10 months since the first day Mommy and Daddy saw you and held you. Ten months since the day that you were delivered, the day that you decided you were going to be Mommy's 30th birthday gift.
Oh baby boy, it was supposed to be different. If only we could turn back time and fix "broken hearts", literally.
We miss you as much today as we did the first month. Honestly, I think we miss you more. We will always miss you, but Mommy lives now knowing that when she arrives in Heaven my little Wyatt will be waiting.
Day 198 - Tuesday, April 5, 2011A perfect saying.
Mommy loves this saying and has used it for our ETSY store and our business cards. Every time Mommy sees or hears this little saying, she is quickly reminded of you. Today Mommy's reminder was yet another sad one. Today another family lost their little baby. She had hydrops but the doctors thought she would be okay. She was delivered this morning but didn't stay very long.
Oh Wyatt, why do little babies have to die? Is it wonderful where you are? Are you able to see Mommy and Daddy?
Day 197 - Monday, April 4, 2011A very sad day.
For whatever reason, this month has been harder the some of the previous months. Maybe because we have hit the double digits. Today marks 10 months since the surgery that took your little life. Mommy still sometimes regrets her decision to have the surgery, but if we didn't attempt the surgery Mommy would have held regret for that too.
Today also marks 12 years since Daddy and Mommy have been together. It's sad that today can mark two very different milestones in two people's life.
Wyatt, we love you so very very much and can't wait until the day that we can be together again.
Day 196 - Sunday, April 3, 2011Mommy's baby remembered in Washington.
Oh Wyatt, you were remembered yesterday in Washington by one of Mommy's BLM friends from FB. She sent this photo to share your balloon with Mommy, as she ensured your name was on a balloon at the release for her little girl.
It means so much to know that you are held in the hearts of many. Daddy and Mommy love you with all our hearts!
Day 195 - Saturday, April 2, 2011Mommy's belly.
Mommy carries a constant reminder of you everyday, and that is your little brother. Without you, Mommy knows that Nolan would never have come along. Mommy and Daddy tried forever to conceive you and finally used IVF. We only received one egg, yours. And then after losing you, only six months later Mommy and Daddy were blessed with brother Nolan. It's just amazing!
Today's reminder is a photo of Mommy's belly pregnant with brother Nolan.
Day 194 - Friday, April 1, 2011Reminder out in California.
Today Mommy received a photo from a very dear FB friend. She saw a balloon float past her window at work and she thought of you. It is amazing to Mommy how people from coast to coast think of you and hold you in their hearts.
Mommy loves you little one!
Day 193 - Thursday, March 31, 2011A tree for you.
So Mommy is thinking of buying you a special tree this year. We would plant it on your one year angelversary. Of course, Mommy wants a blue flowering tree, something kinda like this photo.
Day 192 - Wednesday, March 30, 2011Springtime fever!
Mommy made a beautiful center piece for the kitchen table. Of course, a butterfly had to be included! What do you think?
Day 191 - Tuesday, March 29, 2011Spring has sprung and we remember you.
The daffodils have bloomed and we are reminded of you. The birds are chirping and we are reminded of you. Soon the butterflies will be out and we can't wait to photograph all those that remind us of you!
Day 190 - Monday, March 28, 2011Another hat for Wyatt's Wishes.
Mommy did it! She had enough patience to sit down and craft a Hello Kitty hat without a pattern. It took many hours, but it is complete. What do you think????
Day 189 - Sunday, March 27, 2011A springtime remembrance.
Mommy received a photo today on FB from another BLM. This was one of the first photo Mommy had received in a while. You were included in the photo and Mommy couldn't have been more happy. You are still remembered by others, little boy.
Happy Spring!!
Day 188 - Saturday, March 26, 2011Update on nursery.
Of course, Daddy is doing the entire nursery because the paint has chemicals in it that could hurt brother Nolan. Daddy is making great progress on the nursery. The walls are paints and the trim is looking great. Mommy wishes that you were here to see the nursery, for this is what your room would have looked like.
Day 187 - Friday, March 25, 2011More hats for Wyatt's Wishes.
Mommy continues to push them out. They are so fun to make and so cute! Here is another hat that Mommy made, of course, thinking about you the entire time!
Day 186 - Thursday, March 24, 2011Special hats!!!
Mommy is making hats now too for Wyatt's Wishes. The hats are being sold on ETSY and all proceeds go to Wyatt's Wishes for Angel Care Packages or to be donated to NILMDTS or CHD research. One of the first hats Mommy made she gave away to the cutest little girl ever.
Day 185 - Wednesday, March 23, 2011Meeting another mother.
Yesterday, while delivering the Angel Care Packages, Mommy had the privilege of meeting a mother who received one of the packages. It was wonderful. Though Mommy doesn't know why that mommy was in the hospital or what was wrong with her little boy, it was great to see how much that mommy appreciated the blanket and little dog.
The Angel Care Packages were the best idea ever Wyatt!!!!
Day 184 - Tuesday, March 22, 2011Four working chambers!!!
Oh Wyatt, today Mommy and Daddy found out that Nolan has four perfect chambers and all are working in his little heart. The echo looked so different than yours. You had all four but the entire left side wasn't functioning. We know that you watched over your little brother and ensured he developed correctly. We love you child and thank you for all you are doing for your brother.
Day 183 - Monday, March 21, 2011A nursery in progress.
Mommy and Daddy had picked out your nursery before you were born, but we were never able to work on it. Everything started to unfold before we could pick out the colors. Daddy started working on the nursery over the weekend. We decided to do the same theme that we were going to do for you, it was only appropriate.
Day 182 - Sunday, March 20, 2011Mommy's prego belly.
This photo was actually taken on March 18, but as you can see, you were right there with Nolan and Mommy. Daddy took the photo and wanted to ensure that you were in it, so we took it next to the self with your urn.
Day 181 - Saturday, March 19, 2011More Angel Care Packages.
Mommy and Daddy will be delivering three more angel care packages to the hospital next week. Mommy can't wait to see the nurses and the doctors who delivered you. We are going back up there to check brother Nolan's heart again to make sure everything is okay.
Day 180 - Friday, March 18, 2011Beautiful weather.
Today was the first 80 degree day since last year. It was beautiful out and it quickly reminded me of you. You see, the weather last year was just changing when we found out about your little heart. The warm days remind me of the events that unfolded last year and how much Mommy misses you my son!
Day 179 - Thursday, March 17, 2011Happy St. Patrick's Day!
Well, baby, today is our holiday. That's right, we are Irish on both sides. You can't hide from being Irish with a last name of McGrory. Mommy imagines that if you were here you would be wearing all green and maybe something that says "Kiss me girls, I am Irish!". Mommy is sure that you are having fun in Heaven and that God is teaching you all about St. Patty's Day!
Happy Irish Day baby!!!!
Day 178 - Wednesday, March 16, 2011Happy Birthday Mommom!
Today is Mommom's birthday. If you were here we would have been making her something very special with your footprints. Mommy is sure that you were looking over Mommom today and that you came down to give her a birthday kiss.
Mommom loves you very much, Wyatt!
Day 177 - Tuesday, March 15, 2011World events.
There was a horrible Tsunami in Japan this week and thousands of people are missing. It quickly made Mommy think of you, for there are many other mothers in Japan experiencing the loss of their child now. To add to the horrible events, the power plant there is having major issues. They are saying that radiation can come as far as America. It is very scary.
Day 176 - Monday, March 14, 2011Definitely a baby brother.
Mommy and Daddy found out in January that we were having a baby brother for you, but that was only at 13 weeks. Today was the day that we were finding out for sure. It is 100% certain that you are having a baby brother for the ultrasound showed everything!
You are having a baby brother, little man!
Day 175 - Sunday, March 13, 2011You have a puppy now.
Mommy's little doggie from her childhood passed away last night. We buried her today. Her name is Abby and she will be coming up with you. When she arrives, please know that you can call her boobers, for that is what Mommy used to call her.
Day 174 - Saturday, March 12, 2011An instant reminder.
Blue butterflies are an instant reminder of you my child. From the day that Mommy saw a blue butterfly lying on the ground and it allowed me to pet it for minutes, Mommy is always reminded of you when she sees one.
Day 173 - Friday, March 11, 2011Saw this and thought of you.
Mommy saw this photo and thought of you. Mommy wonders what it is like to be so high above with wings to fly.
We miss you little man, love you.
Day 172 - Thursday, March 10, 2011My little brother is doing great!
Yes Wyatt, your little brother is doing great. We had another doctor appointment today and the doctor said everything looks wondering. Mommy only gained two pounds and brother Nolan's heartbeat sounded wonderful.
We know that without you, your little brother wouldn't be here with us. We love you and we know you love your little brother!
Day 171 - Wednesday, March 9, 2011A challenge for a good cause.
Mommy has posted a challenge for anyone who wants to assist. Wyatt's Wishes is hoping to donate twenty angel care packages to local hospitals by your first birthday!!!! Of course, Mommy is going to need a lot of support from others who can donate blankets for the boxes. But we hope that others will see the benefit in this challenge and help us meet our goal!
Day 170 - Tuesday, March 8, 2011What could have been...
When Mommy sees the scars she knows immediately that the babies went through the same surgery you would have had. The Norwood! But these babies, all of them lived. Why couldn't God have allowed you to pull through? Mommy fits with this question daily. But Mommy comes back to the fact that you were REALLY sick and where you are now you are free from pain and suffering.
Though Mommy wishes with everything she has that you were here with Daddy and her, she understands the pain you would be in and is happy to know that you are free from that pain now. We love you very much and miss you every day!
Day 169 - Monday, March 7, 2011Stop with the questions already!
Today was a rough day. Since being pregnant with brother Nolan, Mommy receives more questions about whether or not this is the first baby or not. Of course, she answers that this is the second baby. You are our first. But today, after saying that Nolan is the second baby the questions just kept coming. It was hard to answer all of the questions in front of ten strangers, but Mommy made it through.
We don't think the questions will ever get any easier, bub. Mommy thinks they will always be something that will be difficult for her to answer. And not because Mommy doesn't know the answer, but for fear that she tells others something they don't want to hear. But you know what, Mommy wants them to hear all about you!!!
Day 168 - Sunday, March 6, 2011Furniture order a year late.
Mommy and Daddy ordered the nursery furniture for your brother Nolan today. It was strange doing this, because the furniture we decided on was the same design that we selected for you. We just never actually ordered the furniture while pregnant with you. We literally ordered the same pieces, the Rockland Caden style.
In a way, we think that you have allowed your brother to be here. Love you baby boy!
Day 167 - Saturday, March 5, 2011A walk for babies.
Wyatt's Wishes just announced that they will be walking this year in the DE March of Dimes Walk for Babies walk on May 1. We are so excited to be walking for such a wonderful cause. The entire length of the walk, Mommy and Daddy will be honoring you little Wyatt.
Day 166 - Friday, March 4, 2011My Child.
Mommy's child is now not just Mommy's child. You are God child, as with all children. But Mommy realizes this more since you can't be here with her. Mommy knows that you are being taken care of and that you are in a place without pain. Mommy feels you with her and knows when you are looking down.
We miss you very very much, Wyatt!!!
Day 165 - Thursday, March 3, 2011A beautiful little angel.
This is what Mommy imagines you to look like little one. So sweet and innocent and perfect. You may not be standing 100% yet, as you would only be nine months, but Mommy imagines that in Heaven you would have plenty of cushion to fall while learning to stand.
Day 164 - Wednesday, March 2, 2011Wow, what a book.
Mommy read a book called Heaven is for Real, and wow what a book!!! This book made Mommy realize that you are in a wonderful place where you have no hurt or pain. You are with wonderful people and you are receiving the most wonderful life ever, which is what Mommy and Daddy wanted for you. Mommy received this book from a special person she meant on FB. That made the book even more special.
Wyatt, Mommy misses you so much and prays every night to see you. But Mommy knows that you are doing great and that you are in a wonderful place.
Day 163 - Tuesday, March 1, 2011"It's a Froggy Life"
Mommy and Daddy put our heads together to come up with this hat. Mommy loves frogs, so much that we made a frog snowman while we were pregnant with you. That is what inspired this hat. What do you think little angel?
Day 162 - Monday, February 28, 2011"Hush Baby Bear"
Wyatt, Mommy has been making hats and will be selling them on ETSY. All of the proceeds will be used for Wyatt's Wishes or donated to NILMDTS and CHD research in Wyatt's Wishes name. This is one of the hats that reminds Mommy a lot of you, which is why Mommy called it "Hush Baby Bear".
Day 161 - Sunday, February 27, 2011Forever Warm and we are Chapter 11.
Wyatt baby, Mommy teamed up with another BLM to join as a Chapter with Forever Warm. Since Wyatt's Wishes provided Angel Care Packages to hospitals and we joined with Forever Warm, they are now in PA. It is so exciting to know that because of you, we can help other families by giving them something to hold on to as a reminder of their little angels.
Day 160 - Saturday, February 26, 2011Constant reminders of you.
From the beginning, Mommy has found that feathers are signs that you have been near. Mommy continues to find feathers in odd places, where the down pillows wouldn't be. It's amazing that each time a feather is found, just how much you are thought of.
We love you baby boy!!!
Day 159 - Friday, February 25, 2011Another day at home.
Mommy spent another day at home today, because she still felt sick. Today it was stormy and very windy. At one point the rain had stopped and Mommy was thinking of Nolan. At the same moment, it started raining again and Mommy thought of you crying from the Heaven's.
Please know that when Mommy thinks of Nolan, it doesn't mean she doesn't think of you! Mommy loves you with everything she has!!!
Day 158 - Thursday, February 24, 2011Sick with a scare.
After coming home from work last night, Mommy started feeling really sick. It was the stomach bug, but it was so bad there were times that Mommy couldn't catch her breath. After calling the doctor, Mommy was told that brother Nolan couldn't be impacted. Mommy was told to stay hydrated and if she felt she wasn't to call back so she could go to labor and delivery.
Mommy stayed home from work today because she didn't feel well. She thought of you a lot and prayed that you would make sure Nolan stayed okay.
Day 157 - Wednesday, February, 23, 2011Mommy and brother.
It's been a while since Mommy took belly pictures of Nolan. Wyatt, Mommy wanted to share them with you since he is the precious gift that you gave to your Daddy and Mommy.
Nolan is doing good and the doctors are saying his heart looks perfect. We have to believe a lot of this is because you are looking over him and taking care of him. We love you so very much and will never be able to thank you for the precious gift you have given us.
Day 156 - Tuesday, February 22, 2011Mommy got her hair cut today.
So why is this a reminder of you? Because, she got it cut back to the way it was when she was pregnant with you. The nice, well kept, Megan style. It feels so much better.
Day 155 - Monday, February 21, 2011A box for your belongings.
Today, after going to more blood work for brother Nolan, Mommy went shopping with Mommom. The purpose of shopping was to get several boxes for the Angel Care Packages that Mommy is making for the hospitals.
After finding several beautiful boxes for the project, Mommy found one perfect box for all of your belongings. Perfect, as it has blue butterflies on the front of it.
Day 154 - Sunday, February 20, 2011A rainbow from an angel.
This week will be used to come to grips with the fact that you are were you are because you are needed there. You are in a place of no suffering, no pain, no tears. You are in wonderful hands.
Mommy found this picture and thought of the gift that you gave to Daddy and Mommy. The gift of your baby brother, Nolan.
Day 153 - Saturday, February 19, 2011We love you forever.
Mommy found this picture on the Internet and it brought memories of you. The memories included how much you are loved, how much you were spoiled before you were even here, how much you were wanted, the number of months and years Mommy and Daddy tried for you, and the amount of pain it brought to us when we lost you.
We are a family separated by a broken heart, but one day we will be back together on the other side.
Day 152 - Friday, February 18, 2011This says it all, and Mommy can't wait for the day.
Mommy and Daddy will meet you in Heaven, baby boy. When the time is right, we will be there with you. Brother will come after that, and eventually we will be a family together. Until then, we live apart, us down here and you up there.
Mommy and Daddy know that you are always looking down on us, and we hope that you know we are always looking up to you! We love you with all our hearts!
Day 151 - Thursday, February 17, 2011Another Valentine's Day card just for you.
Another card came in the mail for you, baby boy. It was from another BLM. It's always so wonderful to receive mail for you. It makes Mommy's heart feel better knowing that others are thinking of you.
Day 150 - Wednesday, February 16, 2011Valentine's Day card from Nana and Grandpa.
A card arrived in the mail on Monday for you. It came from Nana and Grandpa. It was your very first Valentine's Day card from them. How very special and sad at the same time. You are so very loved little man.
Day 149 - Tuesday, February 15, 2011The perfect card.
With the special Valentine's Day gift, Daddy gave Mommy a card. The card had one monkey on the front and two on the inside. It was perfect. One for you and two for you and brother Nolan. The card is displayed in the living room for now, but will eventually go into the scrapbook.
Day 148 - Monday, February 14, 2011A Valentine's Day gift with a meaning.
Daddy surprised Mommy today with a special gift on Valentine's Day. We weren't going to celebrate the day, as we normally don't. But Daddy called and said he got a card and while signing it, your song came on. That is twice now. It's like you are really there!
The gift was beautiful, and totally not expected. It will go right next to the stone that Nana and Grandpa got for you for Christmas.
Day 147 - Sunday, February 13, 2011Painting a room that was never started.
For whatever reason, the nursery was never started when Mommy was pregnant with you. Maybe we knew something was going to happen. But today, Daddy started painting the room for brother Nolan. We selected cream and green. Though once on the walls the cream looks yellow, which is fine. A chair rail will go up once the painting is complete, and yes, we are still doing Pooh Bear, something we had decided was perfect with you!
Day 146 - Saturday, February, 12, 2011A Valentine's Day card just for you.
Mommy received a card in the mail today from a BLM and it was for you. It's beautiful, with your name and bright colors all over it. Immediately, Mommy had tears in her eyes. It is so nice to know that many people are thinking of you.
Day 145 - Friday, February 11, 2011Donation to Wyatt's Wishes.
Earlier this week a package came. It was a very large package. In it was sixteen balls of yarn, a handmade blanket, two cards and a check for $100.00. The donation came from a wonderful person who had found Wyatt's Wishes on FB. The donation was made in her grandson's name, Ethan Andrew.
It brought tears to my eyes, Wyatt. There are so many wonderful people out there, and they want to help. It's amazing, and Mommy is going to ensure that the help is provided!!
Day 144 - Thursday, February 10, 2011Time for butterflies yet?
Just over a month, and Spring will be here. Mommy can't wait. She has missed the butterflies, the constant reminders of you that she saw all last summer. Maybe she just noticed them more, but she had never seen so many butterflies before.
Mommy hopes that the blue one returns this year.
Day 143 - Wednesday, February 9, 2011Empty arms, broken hearted.
It will never change, you will always be gone. Though they say time heals, it really doesn't. The only thing that will heal is being together with you again. It feels like we had something taken from each other, we did, it was the bond that was supposed to be there. Now we have a different bond, one that no one but Daddy and us understand. We still see your signs and we understand them, and love them.
Day 142 - Tuesday, February 8, 2011Today was a horrible day.
Mommy cried a lot today, it was just one of those days. It needed to come out and it finally did. Of course, it makes Mommy feel horrible to cry because brother Nolan can feel it, but sometimes we all have to feel a little bit of tears, right?
Mommy hopes that you don't cry often. Mommy wants you to be happy and understand that where you are, you are healthy. Know that Mommy and Daddy love you and we will see you when the time is right!
Day 141 - Monday, February 7, 2011Our beautiful son.
This photo seemed to be very fitting. Though the child is older than you, the photo with the tear drop and the child means so much. When Mommy saw it, she thought of you.
One day, you will be back in Mommy's arms. That day will come soon enough.
Day 140 - Sunday, February 6, 2011It has been eight months since we saw your precious face.
Today was the eighth month mark of when you were delivered. It was a day that we didn't want to come, though there will be others that will be harder. You were delivered on a Sunday. Sunday, June 6. We have the same birthday, which means the world to Mommy! The doctor's didn't want it to be like that, they said it wasn't good psychologically. But we stuck it out and you were Mommy's special gift.
That day will live in Mommy's heart forever.
Day 139 - Saturday, February 5, 2011A tree in pain?
This picture was found on the Internet and it reminded Mommy of the pain that our family has been through. Your pain as you suffered for 29 weeks with a heart that just barely worked. Mommy and Daddy's pain as we lost our baby boy, as he had to return to God.
It's amazing what one can see in a photo, huh?
Day 138 - Friday, February 4, 2011It's been how long since that day?
It's been eight months since your surgery. Yes, eight months since the last time Mommy and Daddy watched you move, felt you kick, and had you alive. This month hurts more than the rest because the days have aligned. Your surgery was on Friday, June 4 and today is Friday, February 4. It is a very painful reminder.
There are times when Mommy thinks that if we wouldn't have done the surgery things would be better. But we have to remember that you were very very sick. No matter what was done there would not have been a correct action. Mommy and Daddy are proud that you fought as long as you did. Mommy thinks it is better that the surgery was done, as you were asleep because of the medicine when you entered into Heaven.
We miss you so very much and wish life would have gone differently.
Day 137 - Thursday, February 3, 2011A mended heart.
Mommy thinks of you all the time and reminds herself not to be selfish. Though all Mommy wants is for you to be here, Mommy understands that you are in a better place. A place where your heart is mended and is no longer broken.
We love you little monkey.
Day 136 - Wednesday, February 2, 2011Baby boy from God.
Mommy received an email from her team at work. In the email was a picture of a little boy from God. I quickly thought of you and how you worked with God to send Mommy and Daddy your little brother. Some days we feel like we are pregnant with you all over again, like you are returning to us.
Day 135 - Tuesday, February 1, 2011A sad flower.
Oh how Mommy wishes this wasn't a picture that reminded her of you. But it is. Our family has learned so much about CHDs in the past eight months, but we wish would be learning more about you instead.
We miss you so very much, please know that you are and always will be in our hearts and on our minds.
Day 134 - Monday, January 31, 2011Three words that can rip at a heart.
Today Mommy started teaching a new class at work. During one of the breaks, one of the associates told me she was pregnant. Though Mommy is pregnant with your brother Nolan, Mommy still here's the words and they tear at her heart.
Mommy wishes she could tell all mommies just what it means to be pregnant, how much of a miracle life is, and how not to take things for granted.
Day 133 - Sunday, January 30, 2011CHD awareness month and your precious memory.
Mommy wanted to make a photo to ensure you were remembered during CHD awareness month/day. February is heart awareness month and Valentine's Day is dedicated to CHD awareness. Mommy made a perfect photo to remember you during this time.
Day 132 - Saturday, January 29, 2011Tiny feet, you had the smallest little feet.
This reminded Mommy of you, as your little feet were so very precious. Mommy joked while pregnant with you that she didn't want you to have Daddy's feet. When you were delivered, your feet were perfect. You had part of Mommy's and part of Daddy's.
Day 131 - Friday, January 28, 2011A tag reminder.
This was received in the mail by Mommy from another BLM. It is perfect isn't it. A great reminder of you that was received and can be used as a reminder in the future.
Day 130 - Thursday, January 27, 2011Additional pieces of the new hobby.
This is on of Mommy's favorites. Of course, these newest flower hats are little hats for girls but they still remind me of you, mainly because you were thought of the entire time each hat was made.
Day 129 - Wednesday, January 26, 2011A new hobby in memory of you.
Mommy began making baby hate in memory of you. The hats will eventually be sold on ETSY and the profits will be donated to CHD research and NILMDTS. With each stitch, Mommy thought more and more of you, our little angel.
Day 128 - Tuesday, January 25, 2011Another baby has HLHS.
Mommy received a phone call that another baby has been diagnosed with HLHS. This child doesn't have Hydrops like you had, but the doctors can't see her until February. This isn't good. Mommy is praying that HLHS doesn't take another life, this CHD is horrible. Why must it pray on the littlest of God's creations?
Let's pray that one day a cure is found. Love you my son.
Day 127 - Monday, January 24, 2011Little monkey blue.
This photo came from a friend on FB. It quickly reminded both of us of you. Mommy and Daddy have always called you our little monkey, and the blue monkey reminded Mommy so much of you.
We miss you little man.
Day 126 - Sunday, January 23, 2011Perfect hearts.
Mommy was thinking today about the many perfect hearts out there and how there are still so many babies with not so perfect hearts. It hurts Mommy to think that she was so oblivious to the fact that we could be a family with an imperfect heart. It never occurred to Mommy that we would be part of the numbers, until it was happening. Mommy was so concerned about cleft palate, she never gave any thought to your heart. If only we could reverse time, if only.
Day 125 - Saturday, January 22, 2011A monkey cake.
Mommy received this photo from a FB friend. What a perfect reminder of you, little boy. Mommy misses you so very much. It hurts Mommy's heart to know that you are not with her, but she knows you are in a safe place, free from hurt and pain.
Day 124 - Friday, January 21, 2011A rainbow.
What does a rainbow mean? Well it means that we are still dealing with the aftermath of a horrible storm, but through it, a rainbow has formed. The storm clouds may still be around, but the rainbow is present to provide hope and energy.
Day 123 - Thursday, January 20, 2011Big Brother.
You are going to be a big brother, but you already knew that. Today we found out that you were going to have a baby brother. That's right, another little boy. You are the big brother!!!
Day 122 - Wednesday, January 19, 2011A Magnetic Name.
Mommy received a photo today from a friend and it was perfect. Your name was there, spelled out on a Magna Doodle. It was so very wonderful to see that you were remembered!
Day 121 - Tuesday, January 18, 2011Angel Wings.
Mommy received the photo from a friend on FB but it quickly became a reminder of you. There aren't many angel photos out there with a little boy. Oh how you are missed. What we would give to have you back here with us.
Day 120 - Monday, January 17, 2011You and Daddy.
This is one of Mommy's favorite photos. You look so peaceful and so perfect. There a days when Mommy sees your little blanket and wishes you were there laying in it. We miss you so very much son, words can't even begin to describe just how much you are missed.
Day 119 - Sunday, January 16, 2011Wyatt James, the star.
Tonight, Mommy and Daddy received something so very special from Nana and Grandpa. We received your star information. That's right, sweetheart, you have a star named after you now. This is something so very special, as Mommy and Daddy will always be able to look to the sky and be reminded of you.
Can you believe it baby, your very own star?!
Day 118 - Saturday, January 15, 2011Your first Valentine.
Today you received your first Valentine card, courtesy of another BLM on FB. Mommy was so happy to see that someone thought of you. It is wonderful to know that your memory lives in the heart of so many others.
Love you!
Day 117 - Friday, January 14, 2011Beautiful blue butterflies.
This picture was linked to Mommy on FB, as blue butterflies have always reminded me of you. And there are so many here... so many beautiful blue butterflies.
Mommy loves you sweet child.
Day 116 - Thursday, January 13, 2011An immediate reminder of you.
Mommy saw this in a magazine and immediately thought of you. Wonder if you are safe, warm, happy? Mommy has to believe that you are being taken care of. You are with amazing people who have gone before you, and you are with God.
Day 115 - Wednesday, January 12, 2011All too familiar.
Mommy scheduled your brother/sister's appointment today for their fetal echo. It is great that we are able to get early testing, but it was hard scheduling this appointment. It reminded Mommy of the days before losing you. The long days that were filled with hope and prayers.
If only things had gone differently, if only, Wyatt.
Day 114 - Tuesday, January 11, 2011Wyatt's way with ones, again....
Today is the second extra special day this year, two of the three have now passed. Today, Mommy received several messages and posts that many were thinking of you, as they know your stories with your numbers.
Today was very special and meant a lot to Mommy.
Day 113 - Monday, January 10, 2011A gift from God.
Mommy has come to terms with the fact that you had to return to God. You were Mommy's gift, a gift who brought something to very special, the true meaning of life and the understanding of so much more. Though Mommy thought her gift from God was returned before it was received, Mommy realizes now, that the gift continues to give.
You are, and will always be, Mommy's special gift from God.
Day 112 - Sunday, January 9, 2011Two turtle doves.
Before you passed, Mommy saw two turtle doves sitting on the pool fence, this was the morning that we left for your surgery. You didn't make it through the surgery. After returning home, Mommy saw the two turtle doves again while mowing the grass.
When Mommy saw these doves in a catalog, it was a reminder of you!
Day 111 - Saturday, January 8, 2011You're a big brother!!!
Wyatt, you are a big brother, you should be so very proud.
Day 110 - Friday, January 7, 2011Beauty in a snowfall.
It snowed today. Mommy caught this picture while working from home on the couch. She thought of you as she watched the tiny snow flakes fall from the sky. How peaceful and beautiful snow can be...
... as peaceful as you were when you were born, silent and beautiful.
Day 109 - Thursday, January 6, 2011We love you!
This was found on the Internet. It is perfect and Mommy wanted to be sure she put it here so it would be remembered forever.
Love you, Wyatt!!!
Day 108 - Wednesday, January 5, 2011Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep...
When Mommy found this photo, it gave her great relief. The baby in the photo looks so peaceful, and it made Mommy understand again that you are in a better place, free from hurt and pain.
Though Mommy wants you here, she understands why are you aren't.
Day 107 - Tuesday, January 4, 2011Christmas Memories.
There has been a Christmas card photo going around on FB, and Mommy was recently tagged in it. It is beautiful and the words are very touching. It talks of a pure white feather, which is something you have sent to Mommy often. The words on this card mean so much.
Since the words are so small, Mommy decided to put them here:
Christmas Memories of an Angel in Heaven
We've asked an angel in heaven
in a special Christmas prayer
to protect you as you're sleeping
and to tend to you with great care.
For we felt such pain and heartache
when you left us far behind
and throughout the celebrations
you'll be very much in mind
And although our tears are falling
peace and solace will be found
when we find a pure white feather
that has drifted to the ground
Because then we'll know for certain
by this sign from up above
that an angel's wings surround you
with their everlasting love.
Day 106 - Monday, January 3, 2011The special star trees.
Your name was placed on one of these very special trees, my son. Mommy received this photo from a friend with a caption that said, "There is a TOTAL of 531 stars on these 3 trees. I cried as I placed all of those precious names on the trees ~ So MANY little lives watching over us! Bless you all!"
You are remembered by so many, Wyatt.
Day 105 - Sunday, January 2, 2011Your own little flake.
Mommy received a photo from a FB friend and it was so very touching. It was a photo of your own little flake, a snow flake, my son.
Do you get to see the beauty of the snow in Heaven?
Day 104 - Saturday, January 1, 2011Wyatt's way with the ones!
Today not only marked a new year, but it held a special meaning, as it reminded Mommy of you. Since losing you, Mommy has noticed a lot in the numbers. You have held something special with dates since the very beginning and even more so after the loss.
Today was special, it was 1/1/11. One of three extra special days this year, when Mommy will think of you even more than she already does. Love you baby boy!
Day 103 - Friday, December 31, 2010Goodbye to a year of happiness and sadness.
Mommy has looked forward to 2010 ending since the day we lost you, but today she has mixed emotions. It is as if she feels that when 2010 leaves, so will you. This is not true, and she needs to see past this, which she will in time. This year has brought happiness but with it came a lot of sadness.
This year brought you and memories that will be cherished forever. Mommy and Daddy love you.
Day 102 - Thursday, December 30, 2010The first time Mommy and Daddy ever saw your face.
This was the first photo where Mommy and Daddy saw your precious face. This was the day that we had the very long ultrasound, the two hour scan. Mommy never thought this would have been the first and last time she saw you alive. Mommy looks at this photo now and just cries.
Wyatt, things weren't supposed to be like this, it was supposed to be different baby. I am so very sorry.
Day 101 - Wednesday, December 29, 2010A special photo.
Mommy found this photo on the Internet and fell in love with it. It says it all. Mommy just wishes it wasn't like this. She wishes you were in her arms and that you were here now.
We love you forever!
Day 100 - Tuesday, December 28, 2010Little piggies...
Every day Mommy stops to look at one of her favorite photos in the living room. Today it caught me off guard, why I don't know, but it did. Mommy wishes those little piggies could be right here with her.
Day 99 - Monday, December 27, 2010Our first family ornament.
Each year, Nana and Grandpa get Mommy and Daddy an ornament. This year was our first "family" ornament. Mommy remembers saying last year, "This will be our last Christmas ornament with just our names on it. Next year there will be a little one's name listed also." We weren't let down. Your name was listed just as it should be.
Our 2010 ornament is wonderful, as it includes you.
Day 98 - Sunday, December 26, 2010Your very own Lenox ornament.
Nana and Grandpa get each Grandchild a Lenox gift every Christmas. This year, you received one. It was perfect. A little boy angel in a blue outfit with your name written below. So very perfect.
Day 97 - Saturday, December 25, 2010Our first Christmas without you.
How can it be Christmas without you? Why does it have to go on without you? Today was hard mainly because Mommy wondered if you were enjoying your first Christmas in Heaven. Mommy wanted to give you the best Christmas, but that couldn't happen. Instead, God was given that honor.
Mommom got you a cute little ornament and Mommy and Daddy hung it on the tree today. We miss you Wyatt. We miss you so very much.
Merry Christmas baby boy.
Day 96 - Friday, December 24, 2010Your Christmas gift from Nana and Grandpa.
Mommy and Daddy were asked to open your gift from Nana and Grandpa. It was totally unexpected. After opening the gift and realizing what it was, Mommy was in tears and Daddy was fighting them back too. You received a garden stone that will be displayed for all to see in our front garden that we will be creating for you. Oh, Wyatt, it is beautiful.
Day 95 - Thursday, December 23, 2010Aunt Laura's gift to us.
A gift was given to Mommy and Daddy from Aunt Laura and family. It was a gift in honor of you. A baby wrapped in angel wings, so very perfect.
Oh Wyatt, why, why must it be like this? Why?
Day 94 - Wednesday, December 22, 2010Our first family holiday card.
This year was the first year that we could send out a "Family Christmas card". The cards ended up being free from Shutterfly, as Mommy blogged about the company on your blog. That was it, blog and receive 50 free cards. Mommy had already sent out other cards, but wanted our family to receive "Our first family holiday card."
They turned out perfect, don't you think? Love you Wyatt.
Day 93 - Tuesday, December 21, 2010Your name in stitches.
Your name arrived today on a piece of cross stitch fabric. With it came was a little monkey and a wooden monkey as well. What a beautiful reminder from a wonderful BLM.
Day 92 - Monday, December 20, 2010A dragonfly at Christmas.
This came in the mail and it quickly reminded Mommy of when she saw the dragonfly on the side step. The one that allowed Mommy to touch it. The one that sat there for hours. It wasn't a typical dragonfly. Mommy believes it was part of you. Maybe sent by you, maybe sent by a friend of yours to remind Mommy of you. But this little gold dragonfly, it reminded Mommy of you!
Day 91 - Sunday, December 19, 2010A savior was born.
The song and now a card.... They have been instant reminds of you this holiday season. You were Mommy and Daddy's Savior. Because of you so many things were realized and even more changed. Oh, how we wish that you were still with us. We wish that this was not the way. But my child, we will see you in Heaven and we can't wait for that day!
Day 90 - Saturday, December 18, 2010A family portrait, but not of our family.
Mommy and Daddy received a card in the mail today and this was the photo on the front. It immediately brought tears to Mommy's eyes. You were supposed to be here with us this year for Christmas. This should be what our family looks like today, but it isn't. Instead, you are not with us, not physically.
Mommy and Daddy miss you so very much.
Day 89 - Friday, December 17, 2010A holiday picture just for you.
A beautiful Christmas picture came in the mail today, it was made just for you. It is beautiful and will go into your scrapbook, as soon as Mommy can develop enough strength to start it.
Day 88 - Thursday, December 16, 2010Daddy's sign.
It has been one year since the day we found out we were pregnant with you. It is also your uncle's birthday. Last year, he was overseas which made finding out about your pregnancy on his birthday so exciting. This year, we celebrate the short life you spent with us and the memories our family with hold onto forever. It snowed today, the first snowfall this season, Mommy thought it was a sign from you. Also, while Daddy was fixing the dryer he found a beautiful bushy feather way down inside the wiring. He couldn't believe it and knew it was your sign to him.
Keep sending them Wyatt, we see them and we know.
Day 87 - Wednesday, December 15, 2010Ready for the holidays.
We wanted to do something special for you, so we decided to decorate your ashes. Mommy didn't want too much, so just a holly leaf and a Christmas ball, but it looks festive. Mommy loves having your ashes here at home, it is so nice to wake up every morning and talk to you. It is even better to say goodnight to you every evening!
We hope you enjoy your festive decor. Love you!
Day 86 - Tuesday, December 14, 2010A family reminder.
Today Mommy and Daddy received a picture of your cousin, PJ. It was PJ's family's holiday card. The card was so precious and we enjoyed receiving it. After looking at the card several times, Mommy found herself thinking of you and how you would be that size now. You would be teething and growing.
Oh baby, how I miss you!
Day 85 - Monday, December 13, 2010A very special ornament.
It arrived today. Your very special ornament. It came from Sawyer's family and Daddy and Mommy love it. It is so beautiful. We will place the ornament on the tree Christmas morning, it will be the start of a new tradition!
You are loved and thought of so very much.
Day 84 - Sunday, December 12, 2010A day of remembrance.
Today was the National Children Memorial Day, a day when families gather to remember their children who have gone too soon. Mommom, Nana, Grandpa, Daddy, and Mommy traveled back to the hospital where you were delivered to light candles for you. It was a very touching ceremony, one that Mommy cried through.
Mommy and Daddy miss you so so so so much!!!!
Day 83 - Saturday, December 11, 2010A Christmas card just for you.
It arrived in the mail today, addressed to you. When Mommy opened it, it brought tears to her eyes. Daddy looked at it and he may have been holding a few tears back also. It was your very first Christmas card and it came from Alyssa. Mommy has received several other cards but they were not addressed to you and they came from other BLMs. But this Christmas card was handmade for you and was sent from another little angel, well her mom made it appear that way.
This card will be placed in your scrapbook and treasured forever.
Day 82 - Friday, December 10, 2010A snowflake for Wyatt.
A package arrived in the mail today and it was for you, little boy. A BLM made a beautiful snowflake just for you. The snowflake had your name and date of delivery on it. It is so delicate and special.
Mommy and Daddy miss you little man.
Day 81 - Thursday, December 9, 2010Another hospital visit.
Tonight Mommy and Daddy spent the night in the hospital. This was our first admittance back into a hospital since we lost you. Mommy was scared because of the pains she was having in her chest. It was hard to breath and it hurt. Mommy spoke to you all night asking you to watch over her and make things okay. After a CT scan, an ultrasound of Mommy's legs, and an EKG, it was determined it was nothing serious.
Thank you Wyatt for being with Mommy.
Day 80 - Wednesday, December 8, 2010Around my neck forever.
Mommy received a gift today, a very special necklace. The necklace has a photo of our family and a monogram initial of W. This gift will be forever cherished and worn to show all of Mommy's love for you. It means so much to have your photo made into such a very special gift.
Day 79 - Tuesday, December 7, 2010Words mean so very much.
Mommy received a card today from another BLM. The outside of the card was adorable but it was what was written on the inside that mattered so very much. It means a lot to Mommy when someone says they remember you, baby boy. To Mommy, it means you haven't been forgotten, that you had a reason, and that you are loved by so many.
Day 78 - Monday, December 6, 2010Name in snow on your six month angelversary.
Mommy received a photo from a friend today, it was your name in snow. The photo couldn't have come at a more perfect time, Mommy was having a really rough day today. You see, Mommy misses you so very much. It would be so perfect if you could come home to Mommy and Daddy.
We love you.
Day 77 - Sunday, December 5, 2010A little tree for Mommy's little boy.
Mommy found a perfect little tree to put up in your honor. Mommy and Daddy are still putting your special ornaments on our family tree, but Mommy wanted a tree just for you also. Your tree is so very special. It is placed perfectly on the corner of the counter and the lights get turned on every night.
We love you little monkey.
Day 76 - Saturday, December 4, 2010Six months to the day.
Today was six months to the day of the surgery that didn't help you. Today was one of the worst days of Mommy's life, the first being six months ago. You should have been here today not in Heaven. The choice Daddy and Mommy made to put you through the surgery, we only made because we thought it would help you. Should we have known, we wouldn't have done it. Today was a horrible, awful day.
Sadly, Daddy and Mommy spent most of the day apart, as Daddy was in Uncle John's wedding.
Day 75 - Friday, December 3, 2010Ornament for you.
Mommy and Daddy bought you your first ornament today. It is so perfect. We can't wait to put it on the tree this year. We love you so very very much.
Day 74 - Thursday, December 2, 2010A tag with your name.
Mommy loves seeing your name, it means you are being thought of. A friend made Mommy as special tag for you. It is displayed on FB. Mommy loves it. Eveytime it is seen you are thought of even more.
Love you, baby boy.
Day 73 - Wednesday, December 1, 2010"Running with Reese and other angel babies."
Mommy was tagged in a photo a few days ago but she has been thinking about it since. Mommy is so blessed to have met so many other mommies on FB that honor their babies and others as well. The photo that was tagged is of a beautiful shirt made for "Running with Reese". But many other angels were running with Reese also, you were one of them.
Mommy is so very very grateful to Reese's mommy. Thank you so very very much!!!!
Day 72 - Tuesday, November 30, 2010Christmas in Heaven.
Mommy received another photo today from a BLM. It was beautiful and had your name on it. Mommy really hopes that this is what Christmas in Heaven will be like for you. You deserve all of the best, you fought so very hard this year.
Mommy loves you!!!
Day 71 - Monday, November 29, 2010For you during the holidays.
Mommy has been blessed with BLM friends on FB. Today this beautiful photo with your name on it was posted to Mommy's wall. Such a beautiful reminder of you today, son.
You are loved beyond belief.
Day 70 - Sunday, November 28, 2010Angel boy.
Mommom gave Mommy and Daddy an ornament for you tonight over dinner. Mommom wanted to find the perfect angel ornament for you and she did just that. She found a little boy angel. It is so very precious and is so perfect.
Mommy knows you are just like this little boy, drifting on a cloud!
Day 69 - Saturday, November 27, 2010A Christmas tree for you!
Mommy's friend on FB sent a beautiful picture of a precious Christmas tree for you. It made Mommy tear up for many reasons. The tree is beautiful, your name is listed below it, someone miles and miles away thought of you, and you are being remembered.
This photo was taken in Australia and sent with love around the world, baby boy!!!
Day 68 - Friday, November 26, 2010You are part of the face of CHD.
Oh dear Wyatt, Mommy wishes it wasn't so, but you are part of the face of Congenital Heart Defects (CHD). Mommy wishes more than anything that you were here with Daddy and Mommy. We wish that you were here to share in the holidays and spend every moment with Mommy and Daddy. Instead, you are with us in spirit and you will be our angel forever. You will be carried in our hearts as long as we live and we will see you when we come into your world.
Love you son, with all our hearts!
Day 67 - Thursday, November 25, 2010Happy Thanksgiving little one!
Today was the first "official" holiday since you grew your wings. Mommy and Daddy thought it was going to be so hard, but it wasn't that bad. Mommy slept most of the day and Daddy watch television. Then we went to Aunt Heather house for dinner. Shortly after dinner was over your song came on and Daddy and Mommy knew you were there.
We thought of you the whole day baby boy. We miss you very much.
Day 66 - Wednesday, November 24, 2010A special angel ornament.
Mommy is participating in a very special ornament exchange this year for Christmas. This exchange is with other BLMs. Mommy received another BLMs name and her little girl's name. Mommy will be buying an ornament for Hope, whose mommy lives in Australia, and will be sending it out there in early December. However, Mommy already received your ornament in the exchange. The package arrived today and your ornament is beautiful! It will hang on the tree for so many years to come.
I love you angel boy.
Day 65 - Tuesday, November 23, 2010A brother or sister.
Obviously, you decided that you were ready for a baby brother or sister. Mommy and Daddy only just saw the doctor and there was no medicine provided for this cycle. Nothing really occured on the doctors behalf this cycle, but Mommy was late. Mommy believes it was a miracle that you and God discussed.
You are truly amazing little boy, we love you with all our hearts!
Day 64 - Monday, November 22, 2010Hard to focus.
Yet again, another breathtaking sunset. Mommy wondered while driving home if she was the only one to notice. It was something to marvel over, something that made it hard to stay focused. It was beautiful. Wonder what you see from your side? Mommy hopes you are able to enjoy the same beauty, if not a little bit better.
I love you little one.
Day 63 - Sunday, November 21, 2010A part of the family.
Mommy's biggest fear after saying goodbye to you at the hospital was that you would be forgotten by your family. Not your Mommy and Daddy but by your cousins and your aunts and uncles. But that is not the case. You are and always will be part of the family. This picture is one of the Christmas photos for that was taken for the grandparents.
As you can see, you are right in the middle of the family.
Day 62 - Saturday, November 20, 2010Handmade Cards from the Heart.
Mommy spent a lot of time today working on more cards for fellow BLMs for the holidays. Today, an additional 15 cards were made, which included 3 cards for mommies who have more than one angel. Seeing all the cards makes Mommy sad, but it helps Mommy understand that we are not alone, little one. You have many angel friends in Heaven and Mommy has many BLM
Love you.
Day 61 - Friday, November 19, 2010Name on a Christmas bulb.
Mommy has meant some wonderful people since you grew your wings. Many of them take on projects and include all of the little angels. Today, Mommy received a picture of your name on a Christmas bulb. It is beautiful and a great photo for the start of the holiday season.
Day 60 - Thursday, November 18, 2010Wishing Daddy a Happy Birthday.
Mommy gave Daddy a card for his birthday and she signed her name and yours. Mommy wasn't sure how this would go over with Daddy but she decided that your name needed to be included. When Daddy opened the card this evening, he read the three folds, then began to read who it was from. As he was reading who it was from, your song began to play in the background. If I die young bury me in satin, lay me down on a bed of roses, sink me in the river at dawn, send me away with the words of a love song.
Amazing. We looked around and realized that it was Daddy's cell phone ringing at the exact moment. We forgot that it was his ring tone. But really?? At the same moment that Daddy read your name, the phone rang?! Though it was Nana calling to wish Daddy a happy birthday, it was like you were there, at that very moment, wishing Daddy a happy birthday and giving him a great big kiss.
Day 59 - Wednesday, November 17, 2010Painting the sky for Mommy.
Mommy thought of you on the way home from work
You are doing a wonderful job painting, Wyatt. It is beautiful.
Day 58 - Tuesday, November 16, 2010The card with a gift.
Today Mommy received a card from a fellow BLM. Mommy loves receiving BLM cards and to Mommy's surprise, today's card came with a gift. Enclosed neatly inside the card was a precious star ornament with your name carved on it. Such a wonderful reminder.
Mommy can't wait to put this on the Christmas tree.
Day 57 - Monday, November 15, 2010The free gift.
Mommy received the photo book that she created for you today. Similac sent a free coupon for a book and Shutterfly was offering free shipping, so the book was free. Mommy would have paid anything to capture all of your memories in a hardback book, but Similac allowed for Mommy to receive it for free. It was nice to see many of your photos in one little book, nicely organized and put together with love.
I miss you son!
Day 56 - Sunday, November 14, 2010A lovely photo.
Tonight Mommy and Daddy went to Nana and Grandpa's house for birthdays. They were celebrating Uncle John, Uncle Sean, and Daddy's birthdays. Breah's birthday was also being celebrated. On the way there, Mommy noticed the sunset. It was gorgeous. A deep purple, which the camera didn't pick up. But after looking through the photos, this picture spoke to Mommy. It's just simple, an open sunset with a few trees in the corner. It just reminded Mommy of what your view may be in Heaven.
Day 55 - Saturday, November 13, 2010A Christmas ornament for you.
Mommy received a beautiful photo message today. The message came from Sawyer's mommy. It was a photo of a beautiful handmade ornament that Sawyer's mommy made just for you. It took Mommy's breath away seeing this ornament with your name on it. Mommy can't wait to receive it in the mail so Mommy and Daddy can add your ornament to the Christmas tree.
Day 54 - Friday, November 12, 2010Airplanes are like shooting stars....
After you grew wings, Mommy for some reason related the song Airplanes by B.o.B to you. It really has nothing to do with you, but maybe it was the shooting star part. Anyways, whenever Mommy sees an airplane flying overhead now, she thinks of you. Today, the sky is perfect. Crystal clear with not a cloud in the sky. Upon opening the door to talk to Daddy, this is what we saw.
Mommy wished on the star just as the song says.
Day 53 - Thursday, November 11, 2010The Daddymade shadow box.
Daddy designed and handmade a beautiful shadow box to display all of your belongings during your service. Afterward the service, Daddy cut out a portion of the wall so the shadow box could be set inside. It has taken Mommy and Daddy five months, but they have finally finished placing everything perfectly into the shadow box. Today, Mommy finished organizing the box.
What do you think?
Day 52 - Wednesday, November 10, 2010"Mommy, I'm right here, behind the hills!"
Again another sunset spoke to Mommy. Of course, Mommy was driving home from work and of course, she took a photo, again illegally. When the sunset was spotted, it was like it was speaking. Like it was you talking, telling Mommy where you were. It was wonderful. As other cars drove by, they were probably thinking how crazy Mommy was for taking photos of the sun.
But it was beautiful, absolutely beautiful.
Day 51 - Tuesday, November 9, 2010Mommy's special necklace.
Mommy received a special necklace from her team while she was on maternity leave. Almost everyday, Mommy wears this necklace. It is something that Mommy treasures and wears to remember you. Everyday when Mommy puts it on, she remembers everything from the first time she saw you to the last time she kissed your little forehead and said goodbye.
Love you baby boy.
Day 50 - Monday, November 8, 2010An amazing end to a good day.
Today is the first work day since the time change this weekend. Mommy knew it was going to be tough, because she would leave work after dark. However, Mommy managed to make it out just in time to capture the sun setting behind the clouds. Of course, driving and taking photos is tough, and unlawful, but it was done anyway. Today was a good day. Hopeful news was given this morning, nothing major happened at work, and Mommy and Daddy seemed happy.
The sunset was perfect. Such an amazing end to a good day.
Day 49 - Sunday, November 7, 2010The dream.
Last night Mommy had a very vivid dream about a black and white picture of a baby and this duck. The picture captured the baby with his eyes opened and laughing. The baby was only about eight weeks old and he had a long face. The dream was all about trying to get the black and white photo onto a gray matte with a photo of this little duck.
It captured Mommy's attention, because just a few days after you grew your wings, there was a little yellow bird outside of the kitchen window where this little stuffed duck sits. It was like the little bird was trying to get to this duck. A dream? Or does it mean more?
Snowman cookies for you.
Mommy decided to bake a few holiday cookies today. While cutting out the holiday shaped cookies, Mommy decided that it would be neat to make our family with the sugary treats. After carefully using a toothpick to create our names, the cookies were baked. They turned out perfect.
Miss you baby boy.
Day 47 - Friday, November 5, 2010Opening in the darkness.
Today, Mommy and Daddy had a doctor's appointment with the IVF doctor. "Our plan" was received, which came as a surprise. Mommy and Daddy just didn't expect something so quickly. After leaving the doctor's office, it seemed as though Mommy and Daddy had a more positive outlook on things.
You may be able to have a brother or sister after all, little man. Looks like there is an opening in our darkness.
Day 46 - Thursday, November 4, 2010The snow frog.
Mommy was chatting with a few FB friends today about the snow in PA from last winter. It reminded Mommy of the snow frog that you, Daddy and Mommy built in February, during your first trimester. Those were the good days, the fun times, that Mommy and Daddy had with you.
May you build beautiful snow angels this year in Heaven, as Mommy and Daddy make you a wonderful snow monkey here on Earth.
Day 45 - Wednesday, November 3, 2010Something about a name.
There's something about seeing your name that makes Mommy happy. It is probably knowing that others are thinking of you. Or maybe it is just because seeing your name is an instant reminder. Whatever it is, Mommy loves it. Just like she loves you!
Thank you Tiffany!
Day 44 - Tuesday, November 2, 2010Something still grows.
Mommy and Daddy received several flowers and plants on the day of your service. But one of them became Mommy's favorite, real quick. It could have been because it was different than the rest, it could have been because it sat outside for a while, as we weren't home to receive it. But whatever the reason, the plant became Mommy's favorite. The plant still sits on the kitchen table. It is looked at everyday, and it seems like everyday another leaf develops. Initially, there were only three pretty green and purple leaves, there are now more than ten.
Mommy is just glad that something is growing here on Earth with her. It reminds Mommy that you would be growing bigger also. Love you baby!
Day 43 - Monday, November 1, 2010A family portrait helped bring reality.
Today reality hit Mommy. It took five months to finally understand, and it hit today. Mommy was looking at two pictures on her desk, this one being one, when reality finally hit. The reality of the fact that you aren't coming back presented itself.
It felt very sad, lonely, and heart wrenching. Mommy misses you and wishes you would come back, even if it was just for one day.
It's Halloween.
You were thought of all day today, baby boy. Mommy and Daddy miss you and wish you were here.
The costume sat empty and the pumpkins were not carved. We miss you and love you and wish you were with us.
Day 41 - Saturday, October 30, 2010Smiling parents.
Mommy and Daddy smiled tonight, one of the few times since you grew your wings. Your parents had fun tonight.
It was amazing baby, amazing to be able to have the brick lifted off for a short period of time.
We love you and miss you. But we understand.
Day 40 - Friday, October 29, 2010The colorful road ahead.
The change in the season is different this year. Mommy never noticed how beautiful nature is, until this year. Mommy never noticed a lot, until this year. Though you only spent a short time with Mommy and Daddy, you were able to teach them so very much. The five month mark is nearing and with it comes mixed emotions. Sadness, as it is a reminder that you should be here. Happiness, as this family has come so far and learned so much. Pain, cause Mommy and Daddy want you back. Uneasiness, because Mommy and Daddy will be meeting with the doctor to determine the road ahead, just a day before your five month angelversay.
A colorful road with remembrance is the hope. Love you, son.
Day 39 - Thursday, October 28, 2010The special box.
Immediately after your service on Saturday, June 12, Mommy and Daddy decided to preserve the flowers that were on the alter with your ashes. It was something that meant a lot to Mommy. It can't be explained, but it meant preserving one of the only items that Mommy and Daddy gave to you. Mommom spent the next day calling around locating a business that would complete the preservation. She finally found one. After several appointments, many tough decisions, and lots of tears, your memorial box was complete.
Mommy picked up the special box today. It will be hung by Daddy this weekend.
Day 38 - Wednesday, October 27, 2010The unworn outfit.
Upon finding out that your life would probably be cut extremely short, Mommy and Daddy went to Babies R Us to purchase an outfit for you. Two were bought and this is the one that was unworn. It was going to be worn at your service, but Mommy and Daddy were told by the funeral director that it was best not to view you again. So the outfit remained unworn.
Today, Daddy finished the final phase of your memorial case in the kitchen. Tonight your belongings have to remain out of the box, so everything can dry. Mommy noticed your outfit and knew it was your reminder tonight. You were thought of immediately.
Wish you had worn this precious outfit, you would have looked so adorable in it.
Day 37 - Tuesday, October 26, 2010Hate mail.
Mommy receives hate mail once every month, but it isn't the normal hate mail. This isn't mail from someone telling Mommy that they hate her. Instead, it is mail that Mommy gets that she HATES. Hate is a strong word son, and we should limit our use of it, but Mommy hates this mail. One day every month two magazines come. Baby Talk and Parenting. Helpful resources for a mommy with a baby on Earth. Not so helpful for a mommy with a baby in Heaven.
Only Baby Talk arrived today. First time in five months that Mommy will encounter two days of hate mail instead of just one.
Day 36 - Monday, October 25, 2010Snail mail with wings.
Mommy has been busy meeting other mommies who fall into the BLM category. In doing so, Mommy has joined a BLM Penpal group. Mommy received several cards from a special friend from CA. So, last night Mommy got to work. She wrote several cards out to several special mommies. The cards were mail via snail mail today. You were thought of as the cards were placed in the mailbox. Without you, these wonderful mommies would never receive their snail mail with wings.
You are my angel.
Day 35 - Sunday, October 24, 2010On the way to Mommom's tonight, Mommy noticed a beautiful sunset in the rear view mirror. She tried to capture it, but the photo didn't capture the beauty that was seen by the naked eye. Instead the photo captured something better. It captured the way Mommy feels right now. She feels as though she is driving the road of life, moving forward, but all the while looking back into the rear view mirror.
Mommy wishes you Wyatt James. Wish you were here.
Day 34 - Saturday, October 23, 2010The final piece.
Mommy has been wondering if the IVF practice was aware of your family's loss. Mommy has continued to think about the fact that her doctor added another successful statistic to his count for 2009, but he hasn't added the negative statistic for 2010 to balance it out. Then today, Mommy received this letter from the IVF practice. They are following up on the pregnancy and they would like to know how everything turned out.
Mommy wants to respond to the letter by saying, "The one and only egg that was retrieved resulted in an angel. The egg grew into a beautiful little boy named Wyatt James, whose little life was taken too soon. I am blessed to have been given the 29 weeks and 1 day with him and blessed to have known what pregnancy feels like. However, since I don't have any frozen embryos, because you only retrieved one egg, I feel empty. I feel as though I have lost my chance of having other children, as you used my entire lifetime maximum on insurance coverage to retrieve one egg. Therefore, I would like to thank you for giving me the opportunity to carry my child, name my child, feel pregnancy and understand what HLHS. Most of all, I would like to thank you for allowing an angel to come into my life. However, I would like you to know I am upset by the fact that you took my entire lifetime maximum in one thirty minute office visit."
Mommy will not write that though, because I have learned that there is so much more to life. Mommy has everything she needs with you and Daddy. Should we be blessed with a brother or sister for you, that is great. If not, it wasn't meant to be.
Mommy is shocked to see that there is an option on this letter to check "Stillbirth". That is just sad in so many ways. That worst is that it once I check it, it is the final piece of information that this doctor will receive for our chart.
Day 33 - Friday, October 22, 2010A sign that is everywhere now.
Mommy began noticing signs in time shortly after you grew your wings. It was kept with Mommy only until recently. Just yesterday, Mommy decided to blog about it. By blogging, Mommy thought that would be the last of the signs, not that she wanted it to. It wasn't. Today, there were just more. Mommy received two, Daddy one, an old neighbor received two, and a friend received one.
You are truly amazing.
A change.
Today, Mommy has begun to realize that over the past few weeks she has been changing. The pain of losing you is becoming easier to deal with. It is NOT gone, and it will always be there.
Just like the color of the pine needles on the tree are changing, Mommy is changing. Mommy is starting to be able to look toward the future, instead of being stuck in the days of your loss.
This was only realized today, after another tragic event took place. You gained another angel friend, this time a little girl whose name is Danni-Lynn. Make sure you play nice with her on the playground.
Day 31 - Wednesday, October 20, 2010Looking over me.
While driving home today from walking, Mommy noticed the sunset. It was beautiful and it reminded Mommy of you. It made Mommy feel like you were looking right at her. Like you were trying to see what was going on. Mommy smiled at the sunset and thought to herself how wonderful Heaven must look if this beauty can be seen from Earth.
Whenever Mommy looks to the sky, she thinks of you, but today she felt you. Love you baby!
Day 30 - Tuesday, October 19, 2010Mommy had decided to open a FB account shortly after you became an angel. It was something that has blessed Mommy since she opened it. Mommy has found so many wonderful people through FB and today definitely validated that belief.
It's beautiful, isn't baby boy?
Day 29 - Monday, October 18, 2010Cotton in the sky.
Mommy and Daddy spent the day driving home from Illinois. On the trip, there were several reminders of you. There was a bridge that looked like it was a welcome mat to Heaven, a beautiful tree with red leaves, and these clouds that looked as though you placed them in the sky for Mommy. Since Mommy has only been using one photo per day, Mommy decided on the clouds.
The clouds look like cotton balls that you dropped on your way to Heaven to ensure Mommy knows the path to meet you. The blue, in a way, forms a heart.
My child - I love you!
Day 28 - Sunday, October 17, 2010Butterfly in the sky.
As a farewell goodbye, Mommy and Daddy had dinner with Sawyer's mommy and daddy our on last night in Illinois. The dinner was great. The daddies got along well, and so did the mommies. Like friends who had known each other for years. After dinner, we went outside by a fire pit. Mommy happened to notice a butterfly on a pillar nearby. It was the only pillar with a butterfly and it happened to be right near us.
It was like it was a sign from you and Sawyer, telling us that you were both there.
Day 27 - Saturday, October 16, 2010Sawyer's mommy organized a walk which took place today, it was called A Walk to Remember. This walk was the whole purpose of why Mommy and Daddy came to IL this week. We wanted to be at the walk to so we could be with Sawyer's family and show our support for both you and Sawyer. The walk was beautiful, this was the first time Mommy and Daddy had done something for you and it didn't rain. The weather was perfect. We saw a few dragonflies and even a hawk flying in the sky. This helped Mommy and Daddy know that you were there with us.
Best of all, Mommy and Daddy were able to be with Sawyer's mommy and daddy. Everyday
I love you Wyatt.
Mommy and Daddy had dinner with Sawyer's family tonight. It was so much fun. Mommy is so glad that you brought us together with Sawyer's family. It was like being with friends that we had known for years. Sawyer's mommy gave Mommy a candle to light tonight since today is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness day.
Mommy and Daddy came back to the hotel and allowed Cheeky to present you with your first candle of remembrance. Love you baby boy!!
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Day 25 - Thursday, October 14, 2010Mommy and Daddy went to Chicago today. We were able to see a lot. We went to the Skydeck, Millennium Park, and to the Buckingham Fountain. Mommy couldn't wait to see the Fountain, it was one of the top things on Mommy's list. It was Mommy and Daddy's last stop today. The entire day, Mommy thought about you and how if you were here, things would be different. But I remembered that you are still here with Mommy and Daddy in a different way. We were reminded of that also.
Day 24 - Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Today, Mommy and Daddy drove 13 hours to Illinois to be there for the Walk to Remember that Sawyer's mommy is hosting. On the way, Mommy received a call from Sawyer's mommy and she said she received the Walk to Remember shirts. Of course, Mommy had to see them, so Mommy went right out to FB.
The design is beautiful. It reminds Mommy so much of you, with the butterfly print.
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Day 23 - Tuesday, October 12, 2010Walk to Remember shirts.
Today, Mommy and Daddy received the t-shirts that Mommy designed in memory of you for the Walk to Remember in IL. The walk will take place this weekend, October 16, just one day after the Day of Remembrance, October 15. Nana and Grandpa worked to ensure that Mommy and Daddy were able to have these shirts to show you off during the walk. We love you very much and want you displayed near our heart.
Mommy never thought that she would be making shirts and going to IL for a walk. Just over four months ago, Mommy thought that she would be spending this time on maternity leave taking care of you. That is not the case. Instead, Mommy and Daddy will be walking with Sawyer's Mommy and Daddy and sister, and many other families to remember our babies.
To remember you, Wyatt. Mommy and Daddy will always remember you, baby!
Day 22 - Monday, October 11, 2010The pearl ornament.
Back in July, on a trip to the beach, Mommy bit into a chunk of crap meat and found three crab pearls. At the time, Mommy thought quickly of you, Sawyer, and Owen. To this day, Mommy believes that those pearls were the first sign that was noticed. Mommy and Daddy are heading up to IL this week to visit Sawyer's parents and sister. Mommy received a Hallmark ornament from a special friend a few weeks back and thought that this same ornament would be perfect for Sawyer's family. So, Mommy went into Hallmark today and purchased it. The lady behind the counter asked me about the story behind the ornament selection. After it was told to her, two other ladies joined the conversation. They all said, "it must be the sign".
Thank you baby boy. For your sign is bringing Mommy and Daddy together with your friend's family.
Day 21 - Sunday, October 10, 2010A retouch that touches the heart.
Mommy recently established her own chapter with Forever Warm, an organization which donates blankets to hospitals so they can be provided to babies in need. Mommy will be using the donated blankets from Forever Warm for the Angel Care Packages that will be donated to CHOP. In doing this, Mommy became friends with Summer, who established Forever Warm
The photo today was retouched by Summer, and Mommy loves it. You look like a china doll, so very precious, it just touches my heart!
Day 20 - Saturday, October 9, 2010The shell.
Your name was written on a shell by another wonderful BLM. She worked so hard to write all of the names of the little angels who left too soon in 2010 on these sea shells. She photographed each shell and the place them all together to form a heart
Because Mommy wishes that you were not part of that heart. Mommy wishes you were still here, here with a good heart.
Day 19 - Friday, October 8, 2010An invitation like no other.
Today, Mommy and Daddy received a beautiful invitation with Mommy's favorite photo of your cousin, PJ. PJ was born exactly one month and one day after you. Daddy was asked to be his Godfather. We received the invitation today, and Mommy couldn't help but wonder. The wondering turned to wishing and then into that same empty feeling, the feeling that Mommy gets when she knows that you will never be coming back.
Your reminder today is bitter sweet. For it reminded Mommy that Daddy will be PJ's Godfather, for which we are so grateful, but it was another reminder that you will not be growing up side by side with your cousin.
Day 18 - Thursday, October 7, 2010A baby butterfly necklace.
Mommy ordered the cutest little baby butterfly necklace in memory of you. The pieces are made by hand by a wonderful artist out of New York. Mommy received the piece today. It is so beautiful. Mommy will wear it with pride, knowing that the baby butterfly will always be a reminder of you.
It sure is precious, just like you!
Day 17 - Wednesday, October 6, 2010The storm cloud.
Since you grew your wings on June 4 of this year, every time it rains Mommy thinks of you. The raindrops remind Mommy of tears falling from Heaven, as if you are crying. With today marking your four month angelversary (based on your delivery date), to see the storm clouds today was bitter sweet. Although the storm clouds were present, it never actually rained. Again, bitter sweet. For Mommy looks at the rain as your teardrops. So the clouds were there, like you were going to cry, but you held back all day.
That was exactly how Mommy felt, the entire day. Although so far apart, we still feel the same emotions. I love you, Wyatt, will all my heart. Happy Four Month Angelversay!
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Day 16 - Tuesday, October 5, 2010The dragonfly.
Mommy worked from home today and found a dragonfly laying near the door. Mommy thought of you but never looked beyond the dragonfly. Mommy received a message later saying that your name was in the dragonfly's wings. And sure enough it was. When Mommy looked up the meaning of a dragonfly there was a lot of interesting facts. A good dragonfly site: http://www.dragonfly-site.com/meaning-symbolize.html.
Thank you for the sign baby boy!!! I love you!
Day 15 - Monday, October 4, 2010A wonderful card from a wonderful person.
Since the day you grew your wings, Mommy has become friends with so many other mommies who have little angels. Us, mommies, have formed a BLM Penpal group where we send cards to one another, just because. It helps us mommies pull through without our little angels. Today, Mommy received a pretty card from Aiden's Mommy, Jen. It was so wonderful to receive the card today, cause Mommy was just having one of those days.
Thank you, Jen, for making the day happier and for sending Wyatt's reminder today! Love ya girl!
Day 14 - Sunday, October 3, 2010Family of pumpkins.
This weekend Mommy and Daddy got the outside of the house ready for fall. Daddy planted the mums and Mommy made sure the pumpkins looked perfect. This year, Mommy and Daddy purchased three pumpkins. One for each of us.
When Mommy and Daddy return from seeing your friend, Sawyer's family in IL, we will decorate the pumpkins. Mommy was looking forward to doing this with you this year. But instead, Mommy and Daddy will have to do it in your honor.
Day 13 - Saturday, October 2, 2010A ride on Mommy's shoulder.
Today, Mommy received a sign that was riding on her right shoulder. You sent Mommy a pretty little white feather, which was attached so very carefully on the shoulder of Mommy's shirt. Mommy received this sign just two days after telling Daddy that you haven't sent Mommy feathers in a while.
It's signs like this, when I know you are with Mommy and Daddy! We love you!
Day 12 - Friday, October 1, 2010Changing with the season.
So this makes number four in ten day. That's right, Daddy found another four leaf clover. So far, Daddy has found three with heart shaped clovers and one with circle clovers. Mommy likes the autumn colored three leaf clover that Daddy found also. It lets Mommy know that you are changing with the seasons also. Autumn is Mommy's favorite season.
Thank you for continuing to send us your signs. They continue to get more beautiful and we love each and every one of them. Love you baby!
A little ladybug.
Last night, Mommy found a ladybug crawling on the sliding glass door in the kitchen. Mommy quickly took the little ladybug over to show Daddy and of course, to get some pictures. Mommy had to research to find out what ladybugs mean. This is what Mommy found: This tiny little beetle brings with it a powerful message. Because the life cycle of the adult ladybug is short it teaches us how to release worries and enjoy our lives to the fullest. When it appears in our life it is telling us to "let go and let God." (http://www.experienceproject.com/stories/Love-Ladybugs/141399)
Thank you baby boy for this sign.
Day 10 - Wednesday, September 29, 2010 Is it cause you are Irish?
Daddy found another one today. Mommy can't believe it! In a matter of eight days, Daddy found three four leaf clovers. Something that Mommy and Daddy had never found before. We know it is you, we are just trying to determine what you are trying to tell us.
We love you very much! Luck of the Irish, Little McGrory!
Day 9 - Tuesday, September 28, 2010A tribute to be published.
On December 12, a candle lighting memorial will be held at the Children's Hospital of Philadelphia for children lost too soon. Of course, Mommy and Daddy will be attending the service in your honor, for you were lost way too soon. A request was received by Mommy and Daddy for a photo and written tribute that will be publish in the 2010 National Children's Memorial Day book.
Mommy spent all night searching for the perfect photo and writing a loving tribute. Everything is complete, it is just awaiting Daddy's love.
Day 8 - Monday, September 27, 2010The monkey named Wyatt James.
Mommy and Daddy received a monkey named after you. Umpa and your cousin Izzy went to the Build a Bear Workshop and made a monkey in your memory. They dressed the monkey in a cute little outfit and even got him sunglasses. The cute little monkey received a birth certificate, something that you never received.
Although Mommy and Daddy received this monkey, please understand that you will always be our one and only little monkey.
Day 7 - Sunday, September 26, 2010The butterfly balloon.
Mommy and Daddy attended the memorial service at CHOP today. Mommom, Umpa, Nana and Grandpa were there also. Your name was read and your photo was displayed for everyone to see. We were so honored to be there for you. After the memorial, Daddy went to get your butterfly balloon that the hospital gave to us for you.
It's beautiful, just like the memorial, just like YOU!
Day 6 - Saturday, September 25, 2010An angel gift.
Just a few short weeks ago, Mommy began working on crocheting a baby blanket to take to CHOP on the day of the memorial service. Mommy is finishing the blanket tonight. Tomorrow is the memorial service and Mommy plans to take the blanket to the SDU floor to provide to another little angel.
Mommy purchased a little bear to give with the blanket. This is just one of the many blankets that Mommy plans to make and give to little angels.
The entire time Mommy made this blanket, you were thought of. Mommy loves you!!!
From one BLM to another.
Since your angel day, many BLMs have sent Mommy photos and tags as simple reminders. Today Mommy received a beautiful photo of sand and stones on the beach with a poem that meant so much. Your name and date of delivery were also listed on the photo. Leslie sent Mommy the photo today, but I don't know if Leslie knew just how much the poem meant.
For the poem was so very close the one that was used on your mass cards called Sweet Child. The poem took Mommy back to the day that we found the Sweet Child poem. Mommy was reading the poem aloud as Daddy, Mommom, and Aunt Heather stood in the office. When Mommy turned to ask if it was the "right" poem, we were all in tears, as we knew it was the one.
Mommy and Daddy still have that poem hung on the fridge, right next to your pictures. We read your poem every day sometimes more than once.
Thank you, Leslie, for the wonderful photo and poem that allowed for such a wonderful reminder today!
Day 4 - Thursday, September 23, 2010
You were definitely with Daddy again this morning. Daddy was at school and he found a second four leaf clover. This one didn't have hearts, it was just circle clovers, but Daddy knew it was from you.
Mommy and Daddy thank you so much for all of the special signs you send to us. We love you!
Day 3 - Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Your name - Wyatt.
Daddy decided to make something for you tonight. He took some of the leftover yarn that Mommy used to make your blanket and he created your name. After giving it careful thought, Daddy figured out that dipping the string in wax would allow him to mold your name perfectly. And the result was wonderful.
Mommy and Daddy love you Wyatt!
The Bracelet.
Mommy wears a bracelet that is dedicated to you. I received three charms and the bracelet from your Aunt Laura before you were delivered. Since then, Mommy and Daddy have added a few more charms that remind us of you. Of course my favorites are your name and the monkey.
Mommy wears this bracelet almost every day. It is my reminder that you are with Mommy during the day. To be able to look down throughout the day and be reminded of you is wonderful!
Day 1 - Monday, September 20, 2010Meet Cheeky the Monkey.
Cheeky was purchased by Daddy before you were delivered. Cheeky sat by Mommy's side during your delivery and watched as you were born. After your delivery, Cheeky remained
Cheeky now comes on all our trips and events in memory of you. In fact, on September 12, Cheeky completed his first 5K walk in your honor.
When Cheeky isn't doing something in your honor, he continues to watch over your belongings in the new case that Daddy built for you.